Singleness: Complete as one
Brian turned to me with a smile. ‘You know what I appreciate most about June? She is so satisfied with Christ.’
I had never heard anybody make a statement like that before. But as I thought about it I realised it was trues My friend June was deeply satisfied with Christ and it showed so clearly.
That phrase ‘satisfied with Christ’ stuck with me and challenged me. I was 21 at the time, and had been converted three years before. Many of my friends were getting engaged and married and of course I was happy for them. What did bother me, though, were the comments I often heard made about them. ‘Have you seen Mary? She is radiant. She’s just got engaged.’ ‘John’s a changed man. He’s fallen in love.’ ‘I’ve never seen Jean so happy now she’s getting married.’
All these friends were Christians and I began to question in my mind why they had to wait to get -a partner before they could experience the joy and fulfilment that Christians should have. So often I had seen rather miserable-looking people walking around who called themselves Christians. And it had for a while put me off coming to know the Lord. One day, soon after Brian’s comment, I found myself praying, ‘Lord I don’t want to marry until I have learned to be satisfied with you.’ I felt jealous for the honour of God and as I told Him so that was the prayer He put into my heart.
It isn’t always been easy. A few years after I prayed that prayer I received a proposal of marriage from a fine Christian I had known for years. I turned him down. Not because of that prayer but because I knew he was not the one for me.
How many unhappy marriages there have been because people have rushed into them thinking this might be their only chance. He later became a happily married man, to the right person.
Later I met someone with whom I fell in love. I believed, and so did several of my friends at the time, that he was the one for me. But in the end it was not to be. it was a heartbreaking experience, but God reminded me that I had said at the beginning of my Christian life that I wanted to obey His will whatever the cost ‘even though I may kick and scream’, and I was certainly kicking and screaming then. But I had had sufficient proof by then that God’s way is the best and 1 have certainly proved it since.
The overall aim of this book is to show that God has proved Himself to be able completely to satisfy and fulfil my life as a single person, and my prayer is that you will find this true for you, too. He is the same Lord.
I pray that this book will be a blessing to all single people, men and women, whether divorced, widowed, or who have never married.
I feel there are some fundamental facts which are important for us to consider, and which I personally have found to be key factors in my life. I refer to such things as knowing who is at the controls of your life; having a good Biblical sense of self-worth; facing but not fearing the problems of singleness; and how you can make the most of your life as a single person.